“Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like,” said a holy man who conversed with the Lord one day. The Almighty led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew which smelled delicious and made the holy man’s mouth water.
But the people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful, but because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering. The Lord said, ‘You have seen Hell.’
They then went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man’s mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The holy man said, “I don’t understand.” “It is simple” said the Lord, “In this place the people have learned to feed one another.” (author unknown, http:// www.inspirationpeak.com)
Those who learned to feed one another realized the importance of both receiving and giving. Sometimes we can struggle more with the receiving facet of the relationship. To receive one must acknowledge a need – a vulnerability that gifts the giver with importance and value. To always have it “all together” builds a distance with those who care the most for us. If we are authentic and approachable, we must remove the mask of certitude. We can only get so close to someone who fronts that image of the always capable spouse, colleague, or friend.
Our story depicts heaven as a place where everyone is vital to the success of the group. In the pecking order of our businesses, we can stop listening, stop inquiring, stop including the thinking of those “below a certain prestige level.” The front line people who implement the procedures, who get the feedback from the customers are too often excluded from the important meetings and decisions. If we really believe we can be fed by “our subordinates” at the table, we will invite them to meetings with decision makers; we will encourage their feedback; and we will create a culture of ownership that wants accountability.
Arthur W. Jones observed: “All organizations are perfectly aligned to get the results they get.” Are people reaching across the table with their long spoons nourishing each other or are they suffering from futile behavior driven by their own ambition? While such questions deserve a rigorous review of company culture, here are a few practical suggestions to nourish people’s ability to give and receive – to create those moments of heaven on the job!
1. Answer colleague’s emails and voice messages within one business day.
2. Evaluate staff meetings – just because everyone seems pleasant doesn’t mean staff find the meetings valuable.
3. Reward risk takers by celebrating their journey – even before the results are in
4. If you can’t meet a deadline, get released from your promise.
5. Give specific compliments – you will make two people happy.
6. Always keep people in the loop – even if their piece of the project is minor.
7. Before passing on information about another ask yourself, “What is my intent?”
8. Never miss an opportunity to say “Thank You.”
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Security for a Lifetime
A wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream. The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation. The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime. But, a few days later, he came back to return the stone to the wise woman. “I’ve been thinking,” he said. “I know how valuable this stone is, but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious. Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me this stone.” (author unknown, http://www.inspirationpeak.com)
While the wise woman is clearly remarkable, the traveler is also exceptional. He holds the precious stone – his guarantee to embrace all opportunities regardless of cost, to savor the peace that financial independence brings, and to move through life as an accomplished, respected man. Yet after days of grasping the full impact of this lottery like winning, the man doesn’t want it. Why? He comes to understand true success – so clearly revealed by the wise woman’s generous heart. Her reward is complete, enduring, and forever renewing to her spirit. She has mastered the calling of the servant leader. Now that’s the gift of a lifetime.
In Robert Greenleaf‘s book The Servant as Leader, he explains that the servant-leader is servant first. Then the person consciously chooses to use the gifts of leadership to facilitate the serving of others. This person then is sharply different from someone who is leader first. The servant leader is also mindful of two goals: Do those I serve grow as persons? Do they become healthier, more capable, wiser people and do they seek to become servant leaders?
Like the wise woman, the servant leader possesses abundant thinking. Such a mindset seeks mutual benefit, really tries to listen and then be heard, and tosses out hidden agendas. The motto of the abundant thinker is “My ego is in doing right, not in being right.” Just try living that one sentence today particularly if emotions might be charged.
One other thing - if we find ourselves holding back our congratulations and our enthusiasm for others’ good fortune, we need to admit this to ourselves. Such scarcity is sometimes rooted in comparisons. Don’t go down that path. Remember the advice from the Desiderata: “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”
As our Lord prepared to leave his friends, he prayed for them and for us. His prayer resonates with the gracious spirit of the wise woman. “But now I am coming to you; and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves.” Let us ask the Lord for the desire to deepen our generosity and our gratitude. Just to ask for this gift is a great step forward in receiving it!
While the wise woman is clearly remarkable, the traveler is also exceptional. He holds the precious stone – his guarantee to embrace all opportunities regardless of cost, to savor the peace that financial independence brings, and to move through life as an accomplished, respected man. Yet after days of grasping the full impact of this lottery like winning, the man doesn’t want it. Why? He comes to understand true success – so clearly revealed by the wise woman’s generous heart. Her reward is complete, enduring, and forever renewing to her spirit. She has mastered the calling of the servant leader. Now that’s the gift of a lifetime.
In Robert Greenleaf‘s book The Servant as Leader, he explains that the servant-leader is servant first. Then the person consciously chooses to use the gifts of leadership to facilitate the serving of others. This person then is sharply different from someone who is leader first. The servant leader is also mindful of two goals: Do those I serve grow as persons? Do they become healthier, more capable, wiser people and do they seek to become servant leaders?
Like the wise woman, the servant leader possesses abundant thinking. Such a mindset seeks mutual benefit, really tries to listen and then be heard, and tosses out hidden agendas. The motto of the abundant thinker is “My ego is in doing right, not in being right.” Just try living that one sentence today particularly if emotions might be charged.
One other thing - if we find ourselves holding back our congratulations and our enthusiasm for others’ good fortune, we need to admit this to ourselves. Such scarcity is sometimes rooted in comparisons. Don’t go down that path. Remember the advice from the Desiderata: “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”
As our Lord prepared to leave his friends, he prayed for them and for us. His prayer resonates with the gracious spirit of the wise woman. “But now I am coming to you; and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves.” Let us ask the Lord for the desire to deepen our generosity and our gratitude. Just to ask for this gift is a great step forward in receiving it!
Sunday, June 26, 2011
The One Question
The doctor would never forget those 11 words spoken by the elderly man. His patient arrived at 8:30a.m.to have stitches removed from his thumb. He expressed a sense of urgency since he had an appointment at 9:00 am. He needed to visit the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife who suffered from Alzheimer's disease. As the doctor finished dressing the man's wound, the physician asked if the elderly gentleman would be worried if he would be a bit late.
The husband paused for a moment then explained that his wife no longer knew who he was -- that she had not recognized him in five years. The physician was amazed. "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?" The 80 year old smiled as he patted the doctor's hand. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is." (adapted, author unknown, www.oprs.org)
We all yearn to be special. We want that guarantee that nothing will ever snatch away our value. Life’s hazards can sometimes beat upon our confidence, whisper words of rejection and numb our gratitude. Even when our road is perfectly paved – free of detours, no traffic jams, no pot holes, we can be most at risk. We might ease into an arrogance that will distance us from our divine connection and cause us to become more and more self-absorbed.
Here is our hope. Like the elderly gentleman, Jesus cannot break His promise: “I will always know who you are; I will show up every day.” When God seems most silent maybe He is most present. That silence is His gift moving us to figure out what we still must learn before the calm returns. Also if we become preoccupied with the “What if question” we lose our peripheral vision to see God working through the details of our lives.
The loving husband teaches us another truth. No matter how this man's actions were judged -- perhaps with great admiration -- perhaps with criticism for subjecting himself to “unnecessary grief”-- he knew a truth that transcended other's opinions. Nothing would keep him from those daily visits with his wife. Jesus urges us to stay the course. In the workplace, it’s inevitable that some will be critical of you -- no matter how much good you do and no matter how much excellence you bring to your work. If our Lord was denounced as a glutton and a drunkard, there’s just no pleasing the crowd. We need to strengthen our internal compass, trust its accuracy, and then follow the course.
To do this we must get the answer correct for this one question: "Who are we really trying to please?" Bring this question with you to all your business exchanges and see how the Spirit strengthens your creativity, your resolve for good, and your focus on things that matter most.
The husband paused for a moment then explained that his wife no longer knew who he was -- that she had not recognized him in five years. The physician was amazed. "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?" The 80 year old smiled as he patted the doctor's hand. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is." (adapted, author unknown, www.oprs.org)
We all yearn to be special. We want that guarantee that nothing will ever snatch away our value. Life’s hazards can sometimes beat upon our confidence, whisper words of rejection and numb our gratitude. Even when our road is perfectly paved – free of detours, no traffic jams, no pot holes, we can be most at risk. We might ease into an arrogance that will distance us from our divine connection and cause us to become more and more self-absorbed.
Here is our hope. Like the elderly gentleman, Jesus cannot break His promise: “I will always know who you are; I will show up every day.” When God seems most silent maybe He is most present. That silence is His gift moving us to figure out what we still must learn before the calm returns. Also if we become preoccupied with the “What if question” we lose our peripheral vision to see God working through the details of our lives.
The loving husband teaches us another truth. No matter how this man's actions were judged -- perhaps with great admiration -- perhaps with criticism for subjecting himself to “unnecessary grief”-- he knew a truth that transcended other's opinions. Nothing would keep him from those daily visits with his wife. Jesus urges us to stay the course. In the workplace, it’s inevitable that some will be critical of you -- no matter how much good you do and no matter how much excellence you bring to your work. If our Lord was denounced as a glutton and a drunkard, there’s just no pleasing the crowd. We need to strengthen our internal compass, trust its accuracy, and then follow the course.
To do this we must get the answer correct for this one question: "Who are we really trying to please?" Bring this question with you to all your business exchanges and see how the Spirit strengthens your creativity, your resolve for good, and your focus on things that matter most.
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